“Infidelity”; breach of trust, an act of sin, betrayal, unforgivable mistake, end of marriage and what else hits your mind when you hear the word? All possible negative emotions and thinking hit us, a sense of self-doubt arises when our spouse cheat on us. A sense of shame, remorse guilt when our partner discover that we cheated on them, then why does infidelity exist in our society ever since there is a trace of human-beings? What are the causes of infidelity and why do people cheat?
To get an answer for that it’s important to know what does Infidelity mean?
It is the break of the promise given to the partner in the form of oath and commitment to remain faithful to each other. Infidelity is not always or only about sex, it is much more than that. Basic criteria to fulfill infidelity is here to your understanding;
- It includes an emotional connection and sexual attraction
- It de-prioritizes spouse and prioritizes the third party
- Emotional dependency on the third person
- Financial secrecy and cheating
Correlates of Infidelity:
Couples engaged in affairs reported:
- Less time and less enjoyment in time spent together
- More steps were taken toward separation and divorce
- Problems with trust
- Infidelity more highly correlated with greater narcissism
Causes of Infidelity:
- Individual reasons, such as a character or personality trait: It is important to understand that if you were the one cheated on, you are NOT responsible for your partner making the decision to cheat. You are not to blame for your partner’s behavior it was his/her choice to do so. It could also be his/her personality character, few personality trait and mental illness pull the individual into infidelity, such as; Having an episode of manic or substance abuse, a Personality disorder such as narcissistic or borderline and Sex Addiction.
- Relationship reasons, such as relationship dissatisfaction: Many involved in an extramarital relationship out of frustration in their marriage. He/she would have made several attempts to solve the problem to no avail. Or, the individual lacks the skill of effective communication in expressing their feelings and needs and involve with another person as a mode of communication or might be a revenge.
- Situational reasons, such as being in a situation that puts one at risk for cheating given a prime opportunity: Few might not cheat regularly or intentionally, but it could be a lack of impulse control or just being an opportunist (e.g., living away from a partner in different country or state).
Reasons Why a Spouse Has an Affair: Causes of Infidelity
- Conflict Avoidance and Unresolved problems
- Sexless marriage or due to sexual addiction
- Childhood baggage or Financial pressures
- Career problems
- Looking for excitement or passion or a one-night stand
- Get a self-esteem boost or Thrill of the chase
- As a way to end an unhappy marriage — an exit strategy
- Feel neglected or a “cry for help”
- Feel trapped or Insecure
- Hormonal changes
- Is a serial/chronic cheater.
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